Saturday, May 29, 2010

Mixed Emotions

Wow! What a day! I traveled to Utah today! 2 hour flight to Vegas and then a 2 hour shuttle ride to St. George Utah. Let me go back a few days first.

It has been an emotional/rough week. Unfortunately my marriage is not going so great right now. I have asked my husband to move out while I am gone this next month. Don't really want to go into details, but it has been a rough relationship and just seems to not be getting any better, which I honestly hoped it would. The sad part is that he has 3 kids that I have helped raise (or some people may say I HAVE raised them). Not sure how that is going to look, but I know I will still see them and be their "other mom." It will just be hard.

I was really excited about my trip, until yesterday. I got teary a couple of times. Then today, about 5 minutes from the airport, I started getting nervous. I was shaky and had a stomach ache. After my husband and youngest son dropped me off, I got teary eyed again, walking to my gate. I am not exactly sure why....maybe the unknown when I get home, or traveling alone, or just the events that are going to take place soon!

The flight was great, and so was the shuttle ride, but then I got to the hotel, and lost it again. Lonely, bored, frustrated that I couldnt get the internet to work...lol....Went shopping across the street and to dinner by myself. Not used to going and doing things by myself. Was thinking about going to the pool, but it was just weird going by myself, and I am not comfortable in a swimsuit anyway, so that didnt happen.

I know I will meet a lot of wonderful people tomorrow and the weeks to come, but geez I am an emotional wreck right now! I hear the first few days of the week are rough to so I hope I can get through it!

I will definately write again tomorrow! I will have lots of time on my hands.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

Sister you got this!!! I have all the faith in you!!! I cant even imagine all the emotions you are going through but you are a very strong woman! Everything is going to fall into place for you! I am always here for you! XOXO~Kristi

The Girl Next Door said...

It will all work out as it should! You have no idea what a month apart will do, who knows it may be that break you both truly need to work on your own issues and come together differently... whether you decide to stay or split! ;)

In the end sister you got all of us behind you no matter what happens! You are loved and blessed always! Love you and sending you loads of postitive thoughts and energy!

Smooches- T

Anonymous said...

Aunt Sissy,
Everything is going to be alright! Your not used to the enviroment that your in and all of the change that is going on right now. You are going to have so much fun and you are really going to change for the better! You are a very strong person and I know you can do it! Keep your chin up and work your hardest everyday. We all love and miss you back home.
-Kels

gottaluvme3 said...

Thanks girls! Kelsey, how come you always make me cry! :) Love you all!!